What the hell am I going to write about? I’m ALIVE! That’s news! Better yet, I am cured. It is all over for the disease… now the rehab phase. It has been 3 months. Let’s Recap! Or maybe not… “In The Beginning…” What a lame lead line! <dodges lightning bolt through window> Shzt! Sorry, Big Guy… Sheesh! Critics already! lulz
I have a really big extended family with 8 siblings. 7 boys, one girl. All Lyme Chronic Positive. And grumpy as hell. I’ll have to have a really good plan to get outta this pickle. Come to think of it, that is what I was thinking on the highway last night. I was coming back from Riversong Guitars in Kamloops, BC, Canada. There are certified Lyme doctors in Canada. Dr. Rebecca Risk is one, practising in Signal Hill in Calgary. Dr. Ernie Murakami is another, practising in Hope British Columbia. There will be an onslaught for this cure, and it definitely should be provided with the care of a physician. I’m just an alleged Inventor. I have more guts than Canada Packers though. In Paramedic training, even simulated gore made some people faint. This will be a tough battle for the “Client” as they call the “patients” in the lingo.
Then we are all gonna have to be Lyme Doctors. Well, I have a plan.
I was born in 1955. I would have about 6 years left to go until retirement. 1955 will be the Health Care Year from Hell because more people were born in that year than any year in history. What the hell happened since I was so rudely interrupted planning a retirement to Hurricane Alley in the off season when it is heaven? That is moot now, or is it? I can pick up the pieces with some of my retiring siblings and go to Freeport, Grand Bahamas with my secretary and open my Quack DVM practice dealing in Lyme Disease. Canada would throw us in Jail, and the US will sue our azz off, but Bahamas? Plus it is an international container ship port. Flee Shipping goes through there because it is a Free Port. Kiss adios to all the bureaucracies wanting a slice of the pie. It has a huge medical school there as well where they train surgeons in the latest techniques in Imaging and Robotics. My kinda people… My kinda place… It is also where all my banks have their investment arms set up. It is a tax thing. Miss Banks will be so happy.
I was looking for a small used car there at an international auto brokerage wholesaler there too. I wanted a little Dodge like mine here, but didn’t find one when I looked. If I go Right Hand Drive, as weird as that is, I can get a late Mercedes CLK 350 Ragtop loaded for less. lulz Hey, it’s a Free Port. I have a mechanical aptitude because it comes with the engineering territory, and already have an ODBC2 cable to mess with its lil’ silicon brane.
I digress. We would have to set up a Lyme clinic there with our fire breathing computer servers from H3ll to run our hedge fund retirement stuff we can’t talk about due to SEC regulations. I guess I will have to buy a Hotel. Maybe I can pay for it with a Jimmy Buffett Margueritaville Franchise… just brainstormin’ here. Wanna Buy Shares in an Offshore Corporation? Long story short, we have to make this cure as fun as possible.
Aren’t you afraid of imitators? No. They will wind up killing all their clients using existing Best Practices. Oh, the Karma. It is like Ubuntu. It’s Free! Where’s the money? Support! How? You can try to figure it out yourself. I have a whole island of empty real estate there thanks to the financial crisis of ’08. Better yet… There are no crops there and no RoundUp! Whew! It is a 90 Day process at least which I can get faster. Maybe I can get Retired Health Care professionals to take blood for our own Lab. I am just getting started on the rehab but I was really far down there. Say another 3 months. That would give you enough time to see if the Snowbird lifestyle was really your cup of Tea. The golf courses there are absolute hell. Designed by Robert T. Jones, father of the Masters. Just sign the disclaimer here… because a round there may kill you outta angst. It IS Links Golf!
What about Patients? The entire Provinces of Alberta and BC are positive. They have miserable winters. Saskatchewan is worse, the Home of all things Monsanto! Can’t afford it? Well then, do you need a job? I will be needing a lot of people for my Crazy Canucks. Need a diagnosis? I can diagnose faster and with 100% accuracy. Start the cure… watch the critters crawl out… You Be Positive! Dad would want a Golf/Karaoke hospital named after him if Lyme didn’t kill him miserably. I can attest. I was there for a lot of it.
The biggest reason is that it is closer to the equator for the physics of my spaceport. And only certified Lyme Proof astronauts need apply. I was always told to Think Big! 😉